Bluebells and Belgian Beer
April 22-24, 2016
Ever since the Internet showed Mazz pictures of the Hallerbos forest she has wanted to go there. Hallerbos is a bluebell wood, showcasing a carpet of purple flowers under an early spring canopy for only a few weeks each year. Realizing that we were now only a short flight from Brussels, Mazz began diligently following the progress of the flowering season. Due to the popularity of the forest, the Belgian Agency for Nature and Forest Management provides almost daily updates on their website during the spring on the status of the bluebells and the canopy that determines the extent of their flowering. Kirb didn't start out very thrilled at the prospect of spending a bunch of money to travel 500 miles to look at some flowers, but the deal was sweetened with the realization that we could drink all of the Belgian beer while we there.
Some of our German friends gave us grief for planning a trip to Brussels so soon after the March bombings in Brussels. "Are you sure you want to go there?" The short answer was, "Yes, of course we want to go there." Though fear is natural, we refuse to be terrorized. But in addition to that, as far as safety is concerned, there were probably few places in Europe at that moment where we would have felt more comfortable. With heightened security all over Brussels, and rumors of more terrorist cells across Europe, Berlin probably had a higher probability of terrorism than a repeat attack in Belgium. If you don't want to get struck by lightning, go stand where lightning just struck.
One month to the day after the attacks, Brussels still wasn't quite back to normal. After we had purchased our tickets to Brussels, our flights were cancelled due to ongoing reconstruction of the airport, and we were rerouted to Lille, France. Our airline informed us they had arranged a shuttle to take us the 75 miles into Brussels, but we would have to find our own way back to Lille and get reimbursed for the expense at a later date. When we went to book our train tickets back to France, all of the times we needed were already sold out, and if they were available elsewhere, the sites refused to complete our purchases. Not sure what else to do, we decided to rent a car, which we had intended to do for our day in the Hallerbos anyway. We had no idea what sort of town Brussels was to drive in, but we had every intention of ditching the car for most of the weekend while we drank copious amounts of beer.
Perhaps because of this added inconvenience, the flight into Lille was mostly empty. Though the drive on the highway from rural Northern France into Belgium was quite pleasant, we learned quickly that Brussels was a nightmare of a city to drive in. Bizarre uncontrolled intersections, no grid layout whatsoever, unrelenting traffic, and a cavalier "THIS IS MINE" attitude from fellow drivers made us instantly regret our decision to rent a car. We couldn't park in front of our Airbnb and abandon the stupid thing fast enough. It was a fun added surprise to find that we would have to pay handily to keep it parked there over the weekend.
This was the first visit to Brussels for both of us, and we had little to go on besides conventional knowledge about the country and that fact that both of us consider Belgian beer to be the very best in the world. Aside from walking around in a flower forest and wanting to taste as many different beers as possible in our few days in town, we mostly wanted to see if there was any validity to Belgian stereotypes: this was going to be a weekend full of frites, waffles, and chocolate.
After some very good burgers and frites at a neighborhood gastropub, we followed the Internet's advice and went to L'Amère à Boire, a bar in the Ixelles neighborhood where we were staying. Though the place was packed, we found a spot at the bar and quickly became overwhelmed by the bottle options scrawled across on every wall in the room. Some beers we picked randomly, others were recommended by the bartenders based on our taste preferences, but everything we drank was better - and infinitely more interesting - than what we get to drink in Berlin.
When we moved to Germany, our friends said, "Aren't you so excited to move to the land of delicious beer?" We were! But what none of us knew then was that this is a fallacy. German beer is fucking BORING. We already lived in the land of delicious beer; the Pacific Northwest is a paradise of innovative and interesting craft beers. Germans drink very basic pilsners, lagers, and ales, and thanks to a 500(!) year old purity law, the only ingredients allowed in the brewing of German beers are water, barley, yeast, and hops. That's it. Oh, you were interested in some flavor in your beer? Too bad for you. Congratulations on spending 500 years perfecting the Pilsner, Germany, but at the end of the day it still just tastes like another boring beer.
That evening at L'Amère à Boire was like being served a charcuterie plate after 12 months of eating nothing but bag ham. We tried saisons, lambics, trappists, dark ales – each one incredibly flavorful and unique. Every first sip evoked an, "Oh man, that's good." When asked what he would recommend as a "perfectly balanced beer," the bartender thought carefully and confidently answered the VI Wheat from Jandrain Jandrenouille, which they had on tap. Light and crisp yet full-bodied with an aromatic and citrusy hop flavor, it was basically sunshine in a glass. The perfect European Ale with a Belgian accent; it wasn't the most interesting beer of the trip, but there wasn't a better beer Kirb drank all weekend. The special recommendations by the bartenders really made our night, and as we settled our tab and got ready to head home, one of our bartenders told us that we had made his night, which was great. Mazz and Kirb: on a mission to make bartender friends all over the world.
After a delicious breakfast of cured meats, eggs, and crusty bread at Chez Franz, we made our way a half hour outside the city to the Hallerbos forest. We had timed our trip perfectly - the bluebells were in full bloom. Though the spectacle did not disappoint, the sunlight didn't really want to cooperate, making it difficult to snap a photo that captured the sheer beauty of it all. We followed the "bluebell walk," which is not a properly marked set of trails, but rather weaves in and out through several of them, letting you walk amongst the bluebells as much as possible. We spent hours wandering through the trails, gazing at the bright green foliage and vibrant purple blooms spreading magically in all directions before we were ready to head back into town. On the way back to the car we spotted a waffle truck in the parking lot and excitedly got in the line. The woman in front of us got the last waffle. Jarringly, after an entire afternoon transfixed by the magnificence of nature, there was no beauty left in this world at all.
For dinner we decided to seek out classic Belgian fare, and made our way to Le Bugatti for mussels in garlic cream, beef stew cooked in dark trappist beer, and frites with house made mayonnaise. Excellent food all around, but the highlight was the rich and tart mayo that is unlike anything you can get in a bottle.
Our second night of beer exploration took us to Moeder Lambic Fontainas, which the Internet unanimously considers one of the best beer bars in Brussles. There was some initial sticker shock, as some of the same beers we drank the night before were over twice as expensive here, but the selection of over 40 Belgian beers on tap was unbeatable. We decided to just order smaller portions (0.25l) so we could sample more of the wares without going broke.
Though they tasted great, after two beers we were already pulling up the directions back to L'Amère à Boire in an attempt to save some money. Then, fate smiled upon us and seated a freshly off-the-clock bartender named Alessio at the stool next to ours. We started talking about how much we were enjoying drinking in Belgium, and he excitedly began asking if we had tried this and that. If we hadn't, we would just reach across the bar and pour some from the tap into a glass for us to sample. He was incredibly knowledgeable about everything the bar carried, offering excellent suggestions for unique brews like the Abbaye de St Bon-Chien, a blend of three red beers aged for a year in oak red wine casks, or Cuvée de Ranke, a veritable "graveyard" of ales including a lambic (this was Mazz's favorite beer of the trip). It was very entertaining to try to describe the concept of a "graveyard" to someone that didn't grow up with freely available soda machines to fuel their burgeoning diabetic lifestyle.
The bar was "basically family" with the Cantillon brewery, makers of Belgium's finest lambics, as well as with my favorite brewery from the previous night, Jandrain Jandrenouille. They even had a special beer called L'amer des Moeder's made at Jandrain Jandrenouille with help from employees of the bar, and brewed exclusively for Moeder Lambic. Alessio gave us a tour under the bar to see all the taps and kegs and take a look at their exclusive bottles ranging up to €70 a piece. Later in the evening he cracked open a Hubbards Cave Fresh IPA from Chicago that was brought by a customer earlier in the day. Alessio thought it tasted like garbage and refused to drink more than a sip or two of it (it was fine, but the least interesting beer we drank there). By the end of the night we had tasted 15 different incredible beers, and our tab was only €40. We couldn't believe our good luck.
The Belgians love dressing up this statue of a urinating child in kooky little outfits
The next day we played proper tourists and went to see the notable sights in downtown Brussels. We started with an excellent breakfast of savory waffles and eggs at Peck 47, then made our way to Grand Place in between bouts of torrential downpours to check out the classic buildings with opulent gold edifices. We had already sampled our share of Belgian beers and frites, so now it was time for waffles and chocolate. In the interest of science, we tried two waffle places, one which was markedly fancy (€2.70 for a plain liège waffle) and one from the area next to the Pissing Boy statue which was overcrowded with €1 waffle shops. Though the €1 liège waffle was perfectly good, the fancier waffle from Maison Dandoy was unquestionably the best waffle we had ever eaten. For the rest of the day, every hour or so one of us would remark, "What about that waffle, though?" We bought chocolate from Godiva and Bruyerre, and while the Godiva chocolate was clearly better than that from Bruyerre, it really didn't seem like there was anything that separated fine Belgian chocolate from fine chocolate anywhere else. It was certainly no waffle.
We slowly made our way back to Lille and dropped off the rental car, taking the airport shuttle back into the town so we could enjoy our final beers without worry. Kat finished the trip with Kasteel Rouge, a strange but delicious beer that tastes like Cherry Coke, while Kirb ended with St Bernardus Abt 12, an incredibly strong and flavorful ale that he already knew he loved. After another empty flight back to Berlin, we found that the tracks on the subway home were under construction, and there would be delays and multiple transfers. We bought some German beer from the döner shop in the U-Bahn station and settled in for an extended final leg home. After what was easily the best three days of beer drinking of our entire lives, the uninspired German pilsner tasted more boring than ever.
What we drank:
Bertinchamps Triple
Brasserie des Franches-Montagnes Abbaye St Bon Chien
Brouwerij Kerkom Adelardus Tripel
Brouwerij Kerkom Bink Bloesem
Brouwerij de Ranke Saison De Dottignies
Brouwerij de Ranke Noir de Dottignies
Brouwerij de Ranke Cuvée de Ranke
Brasserie de la Senne Birthday Session
Bush Pêche Mel
Cantillon Faro
Cantillon Lambic
Caulier 28 Tripel
Gouden Carolus Ambrio
Hubbard's Cave Fresh IPA
Jandrain Jandrenouille L'Amer des Moeders
Jandrain Jandrenouille La Moederation
Jandrain Jandrenouille IV Saison
Jandrain Jandrenouille VI Wheat
Kasteel Rouge
Malheur 10
Poperings Hommel Bier
Ramée Ambree
Ramée Blanche
Rochefort Trappistes 10
St Bernardus Abt 12
Straffe Hendrik Tripelbier 9°
Troubador Magma
Verzet Oud Bruin
Westmalle Trappist Tripel